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MAXIMize the Moment Junior Volume 1, Issue 8

MAXIMize the Moment Junior Volume 1, Issue 8

June 3, 2002
Document
Topic: 
MAXIMize the Moment Junior
Age Range: 
8-10

Story

As I out to recess, I hear Chuck's voice behind yelling, "Hey, moron, are you still too scared to come and fight me?" Before I have time to react, Chuck spins me around. Everyone is watching us and waiting to see what will happen next.

Encouraged by attention, Chuck decides to take action. I feel the pain and realize that Chuck hit me. I get back at him by knocking him square in the face. Then, suddenly, the crowd is breaking up. Mr. Hall is standing between Chuck and me. He tells us to go to the Principal's office

When we get there, I'm really upset. I'm still mad at Chuck and I'm going to end up getting suspended because he picked a fight. I look over at Chuck and realize that I should have found a better solution. Fighting hasn't made things better between us and now we'll both have suspensions to add to our list of worries. If either Chuck or I had tried to listen more and talk less, we probably wouldn't be in this situation.

It's time to stop solving problems with violence and anger and start listening instead. Like the saying goes, "An eye for an eye leaves everybody blind."

This week's maxim is "An eye for an eye leaves everybody blind."  

Maxim

  • "An eye for an eye leaves everybody blind."
    Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Character points

  • Peace - I want to understand others; I try to find positive solutions to disagreements.
  • Understanding -I work to see situations from others' points of view and try to address all aspects of a problem..
  • Respect - I recognize and value differences.
  • Acceptance - I recognize and am patient with others when they express different views.
  • Consideration - I take the time to really think about an issue, rather than coming to a quick conclusion.
  • Patience - I take the time to make choices based on my beliefs and values.
  • Forgiveness - I am willing to look past the wrongdoings of others, so our relationships can move forward.
  • Reconciliation - I am willing to work at my relationships; I see difficulties as opportunities for growth.

Homeroom Discussion Information

  • What are some ways of creating compromise?
  • How do you handle situations in which you really don't like another person?
  • What should you do if someone is being mean and picking on you?
  • Is "But he started it" a really good excuse for fighting? What is a more positive way of dealing with times that sometimes picks a fight with you?
  • What should you do if someone makes you really angry?
  • How can you calm a situation in which people are getting hot-tempered?
    Do you agree with today's maxim?
  • What are some other situations/conflicts that it could apply to?

Home-Use Information

Five tips for maxim-izing your family time

  • Brainstorm ways to have a "good fight." Some suggestions are setting a time that all parties agree to, not using accusatory language, and using "I messages."
  • Model what it means to be a "good fighter." Work through conflicts, instead of ignoring them. Treat people with respect even when you are angry, hurt, or disappointed.
  • Watch the news with your children. Ask them what they know about the conflict and help to clear up misunderstandings.
  • Ask your children to tell you about the problems that they face. Even if they say, "Everything's fine," keep asking. Try to get a sense of the stresses in their lives at school, on teams, at home, etc. Ask specific questions.
  • Be a good listener. Ask questions and wait for the answer before thinking of a response. Don't be afraid of pauses in the conversation. If you have to, discipline yourself by counting to ten before asking another question.

Discussion starters

  • Is conflict always bad?
  • How can conflict be a good thing?
  • When do conflicts become a problem?
  • How can you make arguments useful?
  • How can we, as a family, use conflict in a positive way?
  • Are conflict and anger the same thing? What is the difference?
  • Is anger always bad? When does it become a problem?
  • Are there ever times when fighting is justified and necessary? Why or why not?

Be sure to acknowledge the courage your children show in talking with you about these issues.

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