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MAXIMize the Moment Volume 1, Issue 25

MAXIMize the Moment Volume 1, Issue 25

April 15, 2002
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MAXIMize the Moment

"Now it's time to MAXIMize the Moment!"

"Lindsey, I've got to give Ana some credit for trying a new look, but what was she thinking?" I say as my best friend and I walk down the hall on our way to lunch. "She actually asked me if I liked it."

"Chloe, how did you field that one?"

"Well, I told her that it really was cute and that it brought out her eyes. Really, what was I supposed to say? 'Ana, it's just tragic. It makes your nose look bigger and your face seem even more plain. But at least it'll grow out.'"

Lindsey starts laughing. It's not that we really hate Ana or anything. It's just that she thinks we're better friends with her than we are. She's always hanging around and trying to be like us. It can get pretty annoying-so Lindsey and I figure that we have a right to at least have some laughs for our troubles. Most of the other girls don't even talk to Ana because she's so weird. We're way nicer to her than everybody else is. Besides, she doesn't know, so it's not like we're hurting her or anything.

Then, I see a person flying past me in the direction of the girls' bathroom. It's Ana. It sounded like she may be crying. I wonder if she heard Chloe and I talking. I wonder if that's why she's so upset. What have I done? Did I hurt her that much? Suddenly, I understand what my mother has been telling me. Whenever I say anything mean about someone, she reminds me "Keep your words sweet-you may have to eat them."

I don't know whether Ana heard me or not, but I wish that I'd never said those spiteful things. Ana's in the bathroom crying and it's probably because I hurt her or someone else did. Whether she heard me or not, I shouldn't have said those things about her. She certainly doesn't need anything else going wrong in her life. I will try to apologize for saying those awful things, but I don't know if she'll be able to forgive me of if she'll even want to listen to me. I can't blame her. She has every right to be hurt and angry. One thing I know I can do, though, is to be more careful of what I say and how I say it. I don't want to keep hurting other people. From now on, I'll remember to keep my words sweet because I may have to eat them.

This week's maxim is "Keep your words sweet-you may have to eat them."

Teacher Information

Maxim

  • "Keep your words sweet-you may have to eat them."
    Stephan Grellet

Featured character trait

  • Empathy-I am able to see the world through others' eyes and feel what they are feeling

Character points (for substitution if this week's trait isn't one of your school's core values)

  • Concern for others-I care about others and want them to be happy.
  • Caring-I recognize that my actions affect others and I try to do what is best for them.
  • Compassion-I am willing to enter into the suffering of others and I try to ease their pain.
  • Love-I strive to do what is best for others because I care deeply about them.
  • Decency-I behave in a way that is consistent with the values of my community and its ideals.
  • Humility-I realize that I am not perfect; I am able to acknowledge my faults and wrongdoings, and I try to make them right.

Discussion starters / journal writing prompts

  • Teasing is a something that many adults think only happens among younger children. Does teasing happen in middle school and high school? Are there similar behaviors that are called by some other name?
  • If someone is talking about another person behind his/her back and what he/she is saying is accurate, is it OK? Is it necessary? Is it kind?
  • Does the information have to be untrue for it to be hurtful?
  • How do you feel about yourself when someone catches you making fun of him/her?
  • How do you think that other person feels?
  • Would you want to be friends with someone who had a reputation for making snide comments about others?
  • Do you think you are more likely to earn friends by being kind or by making witty, yet unkind, comments about others?
  • What are some reasons that people make fun of other people?
  • How can you confront a friend who is saying mean things about someone?
  • Imagine that Chloe gets to the bathroom and finds out that Ana is upset about something totally unrelated. Should she still apologize to Ana? Why or why not?
  • Lindsey and Chloe feel like they have a right to laugh at Ana because she wants to be their friend, but they don't want to be hers. By pretending to be friends with her, are they actually sparing her feelings?
  • Should they feel obligated to like her just because she likes them?
  • If someone likes you a lot, but you don't feel the same way, do you have to be his/her friend? If not, how can you deal with the situation in a way that is still loving and kind?

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