Maximize The Moment: Volume 1, Issue 7

Now it's time to MAXIMize the Moment!

Why is it that some people always seem to say the right thing at the right time and I manage to do just the opposite?! I'm always the one who asks how someone's boyfriend is doing the day after they broke up. Or about a sick aunt—who ends up having just died. I don't think that I could time things worse if I tried.

Today was certainly not the worst flub I've ever made. It was an honest mistake—really. No one had told me that it was a surprise party and that Molly wasn't supposed to know.

Still, I feel like a complete idiot! Sabina and Beth had been planning this party for weeks and Molly didn't have a clue until I called her to ask her what she was planning on wearing. If only I hadn't been so insecure about my outfit. Or so vain about needing to have on just the right thing. If I weren't so chatty. My mother always says that I talk too much and that I should be quieter and more ladylike. I am such a disaster!

I still can hardly believe that I ruined everything—again. Maybe I should try to be more gentle, like my friend Diana. She never says the wrong thing. She seems to have been born lovely, delicate, feminine.

Not me, though. Nope. I'm the girl whose voice is a little too loud. Whose laugh is too robust. Who seems to say whatever pops in her head the moment that it does so. That's me—forever rough around the edges.

Will I ever learn?!

Well, I can start now. I'll be more subtle at this party. I'll be graceful. I'll be demure. All I need to do is exactly the opposite of what comes naturally. I will no longer make a fool of myself. From now on, I'll be sly.

I get dressed for the party in an outfit that is the perfect blend of sophistication and invisibility. It will go perfectly with my new outlook. This will be the best party ever…

But, somehow, it's not. It's actually pretty dull—lifeless even. But why?

Then, Beth walks up to me, "Are you OK, Anne? You really don't seem yourself tonight. Is anything wrong? Usually you're so much fun. You're so full of life."

And then I realize what's missing from the party—me. I don't mean to sound full of myself, but I shouldn't be ashamed of who I am. It reminds me of a quote my dad used to always say to us kids when we were little: "Do not wish to be anything but what you are and try to be that perfectly."

That's it. I am a bit of a mess. I do sometimes ask the wrong questions at the wrong time, but I only ask because I care. And, if I cared less, I wouldn't be me. I am certainly imperfect, but I'm pretty good anyway. And the world needs someone like me—imperfect as I am. If I ever again hesitant to be myself, if I doubt my own value, and when I can't figure out who I should be, I'll MAXIMize the Moment! I do not wish to be anyone but who I am, and I will try to be that perfectly.

This week's maxim is "Do not wish to be anything but what you are, and try to be that perfectly."

Teacher Information

Maxim

• "Do not wish to be anything but what you are, and try to be that perfectly."
  St. Francis de Sales

Featured character trait

• Acceptance — I recognize imperfections, but I look at the goodness of the whole.

Character points (for substitution if this week's trait isn't one of your school's core values)

• Authenticity — I am genuine; I acknowledge my gifts and areas for growth.
• Serenity — I am at peace with myself; I deal with troubles with patience, grace, and resolve.
• Humility — I recognize my gifts and realize that I have a responsibility to use them; I am aware of my faults and work to improve myself.

Discussion starters / journal writing prompts

• Who is your hero?
• Name also an "everyday person" hero in your life.
• List six positive and two negative characteristics of each.
• Are there different kinds of imperfections?
• List at least three that are bad; three that are neutral; and three that may have some positive side effects. Could some things fit in more than one category? Why or why not?
• If you could change anything about yourself, what would you change? Why? (Allow some time for students to react to some of the things their peers raise.) How important are those things, really?
• Is it possible to be accepting of yourself and still trying to improve yourself? How?
• Why is it important to accept your life as it is today?
• Why is it important to accept yourself as you are?
• What sorts of things are not acceptable in oneself?