MAXIMize the Moment Volume 1, Issue 7

Now it's time to MAXIMize the Moment!

"No, Juan, you won't get to pick your own groups for this project," says Mrs. Chang as she passes out the assignment sheet.

Fortunately, Mrs. Chang puts a couple of my friends in my group. Unfortunately, though, she also puts Tarik in my group.

We all decide to get together at my house on Saturday.

Saturday, my mother is making sandwiches for everybody. I tell her not to make one for Tarik and she asks why.

"Mom," I say, "he's fasting for Ramadan. I definitely have the worst luck—we have to do a project on US foreign policy in the Middle East and I get stuck in the group with the Muslim kid! He probably hates America."

My mother is not at all pleased with my opinion: "Wow! I never imagined that my son would say such a thing! Remember what Seneca once said, 'If you would judge, understand.'"

Great! Just what I need. My mother, a Classics professor at the local college, can't let a day go by without subjecting me to the wit and wisdom of philosophers long dead and buried.

"Whatever, Mom, I'll try to keep that in mind," I say.

In just a little while, everyone has arrived.

I'm the group leader, so I have to facilitate the discussion: "Since we have to come up with a group statement, let's just start by going around the table and getting each person's general impressions on the subject."

Jay jumps in: "Eric, do we really want EVERYONE's impressions? I don't want to hear Tarik start ripping on the US."

What should I do? I'm stuck being in charge of the whole group. But I'm not in the mood to hear anything bad about America.

I suddenly remember my mother's words, "If you would judge, understand." Mom was right. Rather than jumping to conclusions about Tarik, we should let him speak. If I presume to know everything about Tarik just because he's Muslim, then I'M the prejudiced one.

"Jay, it sounds like YOU'RE the one making snap judgments. Tarik's been totally cool. Come on, now, don't you think we should hear from everybody? None of us have exactly the same opinion—we might as well learn from each other."

By the end of the day, we have heard from everyone, thought through our position, and divided up the rest of the work. I have a great feeling about it; this project is going to turn out well. I know a lot more about US foreign policy than I did this morning. And that's not even the real lesson I learned today. For the future, I gotta remember what Seneca said: "If you would judge, understand."

This week's maxim is "If you would judge, understand."

Teacher Information

Maxim

• "If you would judge, understand."
  Seneca

Featured character trait

• Understanding — I try to listen to listen the opinions of others and see where they are coming from.

Character points (for substitution if this week's trait isn't one of your school's core values)

• Respect — I acknowledge and value differences and work to create healthy dialogue.
• Acceptance — I recognize and am patient with others when they express different views.
• Fairness — I believe in equality and respect the rights of others.
• Consideration — I take the time to really consider an issue, rather than coming to a quick, uninformed conclusion.
• Sensitivity — I am aware of the needs and feelings of others.

Discussion starters / journal writing prompts

• How realistic is this situation here? Why?
• Put yourself in the shoes of the Muslim student. What must it be like?
• What sorts of things cause you to make rash judgments about others?
• Have you ever had someone make a quick judgment about you? How did it make you feel?
• Have you ever quickly judged someone and later discovered you were wrong?
• To what extent do you think this situation describes prejudice?
• How can we reduce prejudice at this school?
• What does it mean to be prejudiced?
• Do all people have prejudices?
• Why are prejudices so dangerous?
• What can you do to stop yourself from making rash judgments?
• Is being cliquey a form of prejudice? In what ways is it similar?
• How can understanding help to make this a more pleasant place?
• If everyone at this school were understanding and respectful to everyone else, what would it be like?